Hmm.. For Once I Don't Know

As I'm writing this blog I was talking to my friend/sister Katie and the book I'm reading, The Last Song, and it got me thinking about the "L" word. Yes, I'm talking about love. I am a complete romantic. I'm the girl who wants to get swept off her feet and wants to come home everyday to someone who loves me no matter what I look like, whether its groggy from waking up, or a really bad hair cut or I'm completely sick and look like I'm dying. I don't think its too much to ask for, I'd do the same. I want that unconditional love and I want to give that to someone else.

People think I go through guys like nothing and that they're "whatever" to me, but that's not it. The thing is that my parents raised me to think and analyze my relationships and I think seeing some of the stuff my parents go through makes me kinda weary when it comes to high school relationships. My parents are high school sweet hearts and though they still love each other and I know they do, I just don't know if that life is for me. Three times this summer someone has told me that they're in love with me and to be honest it freaked me out. First of all they're my friends and it was weird. Secondly it made me question their feelings. How do I know what they're feeling is love? What does it mean to them? How serious are they? Do they understand what that means? Is it really love or just lust? Things like that run through my mind and when guys say that to me it makes me wanna run for they hills. Love is serious and scary when you don't know what you're getting into, especially when you're young.

Frankly I've never been in love (as you can probably tell), I've only read about it on the books and shows I've watched; they project this ideal image of what love is. Quite frankly, I don't know anything about love accept that when your in love, you'll know. Its not like right now I'm looking for love or anything, it's just something I want (I think everyone wants its, regardless if they admit it or not). Love is a very big deal and some people fall in and out of love all the time, some people fall in love and don't get love in return. And some people never experience it. When you put it all together it can be very depressing, but maybe you have to go through all the ugliness and when you get to the "pot of gold at the end of the rainbow" its probably pretty magical.

This is pretty much life ya know? There's good and bad, light and darkness, anger and happiness, the list could go on but what we got to remember is that life wouldn't be as memorable with out the bad, life wouldn't have meaning without over coming the hardships (WOW, OK I just went off topic). But its the truth, the way I see it and I wanted to say it. So now that I'm done submerging you in my thoughts, I want you to meditate and think about love and life and how you see it.

-Yvette